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The Reality of Divorce

I am a divorce Attorney in Dallas, Texas.    In today’s fast and furious life style, I have seen that opportunities for individuals to violate their vows of marriage occur more often in individual’s lives.   The internet has made it so easy for individuals to seeks companionship and sex under the fake cloak of the anonymity.

The most common reason I hear from my clients regarding their decision to file for divorce against their partners is adultery.  In other words, their partner has been unfaithful.  Or to be blunt,  their partner had sexual relations with another person while married to the client.

I get calls every day from normal people who never conceived that the word “divorce” would be uttered by them or their spouse. Unfortunately, in society today, we expect things to happen quickly including dissolving a marriage. We have lost the ability to be patient and try to work through our problems in a civil and considerate way.

Most people are surprised but not necessarily shocked that their spouse has even considered filing for a divorce. Even worse is when a person is unexpectedly served with divorce papers. In a split second, all love…all civility…all caring…goes out the window. Your marriage turns into a living hell where the only objective is to hurt the other person more than they will hurt you.

If a divorce will be part of your future, don’t lose sight of your life. There is life after a divorce. There is life during a pending divorce. You must maintain a sense of respect and dignity. Communication is the key. Don’t stop the channel of communication between you and your spouse. What you don’t know will scare you more than what you know.

At the first hint of divorce,  start getting your financial records copied.   Inventory all your assets, financial or otherwise, including debts and other liabilities owed jointly or individually.  The more prepared you are heading into a divorce,  the more your attorney will be able to help you either in trying to settle your case out of court, in mediation or in a court trial.

As an individual, you will get past any crisis in your life. Keep in mind that if the “situation does not destroy you…it will only make you a stronger person in the future”. With the right attitude and maybe with the right attorney, you will succeed in enjoying life again and maintaining your family even after divorce.

Roland Barbosa, attorney and counselor at law

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